Here are some daily habits for kids that will not only make your life easier, but will also teach responsibility and self-control.
If you’re anything like me, you undoubtedly share one of my fears…
The fear that we will raise entitled children.
We believe in our children, recognise their potential, and know they can do great things… The difficult aspect is this.
Furthermore, we are all too aware that our decisions, norms, and family culture have a direct impact on whether or not our children become entitled.
For a moment, consider what it means to be entitled.
Entitled (n): an attitude, demeanour, or air of rudeness, ingraciousness, combativeness, making an unreasonable demand for service, feeling entitled to do or have what you want without having to work for it or deserve it.
The good news is that by establishing fair and reasonable rules and boundaries and requiring our children to follow them, we help teach our children responsibility and positive habits.
This week’s post is about simple behaviours that might assist women who are feeling stressed generate a sense of order and tranquilly.
Do you feel like:
- You have the impression that all you do all day is follow your kids around and clean up after them.
- You have the impression that the kids produce a lot of messes but never want to help clean them up.
- The kids expect you to do everything for them and do not want to do it themselves.
- Instead of feeling like a leader, you feel like a “victim” to your children.
If this describes you, take heart: we’ll be delving into this extensively in the near future.
But for now, let’s focus on a few basic practises that will provide you much-needed tranquilly while also teaching your children crucial life and character skills.
Habits Kids Need To Form
Choose A time to Begin The Day
This is one of the most beneficial daily routines for children that you can establish. Create a rule for a time of day that corresponds well with your children’s natural wake-up time.
No one can leave till that hour. This permits you to sleep in a little later and wake up early. In the stillness before the storm, read your devotional, the Bible, or simply stare out the window.
Of course, you would answer if your children needed you!
this helps kids master:
- Boredom as a tool to creativity
- Respect for boundaries
Cleaning Up After Meals
Breakfast should be served. Clean up after breakfast. Then, serve the snack. Snack for cleaning up. Lunch is ready. Lunch should be cleaned up. Serve a snack, then dinner, and then clean up the kitchen disaster.
Mom spends a lot of time cleaning up after her children. They also use a lot of emotional and mental bandwidth because messes = clutter and clutter = low level anxiety, depending on your personality.
What is the solution?
A cleaning policy.
This could imply establishing ground rules for how you want mealtimes to conclude. If you want all snacks to be served at the table, then dishes should be carried to the sink or counter. This is a daily practise for children that is absolutely necessary for women with large families.
Perhaps you decide that no one should leave the kitchen after meals until it is completely spotless. This is something we do at supper. Everyone is given a job. Place dirty dishes on the counter, load the dishwasher, sweep the floor, wipe off the table top, and so on.
It’s a total frenetic chaotic madhouse, but we keep going in the hopes that it will someday pay off. Also, within 15 minutes, it’s completely clean, and I don’t have to do it alone when they’re in bed.
This helps kids master:
- Contribution and responsibility
- Diligence in completing chores to the family standard
- Patience and self-control to put off play until hard work is done
Clean Up Toys
Toys for children are the focus of the day. No child’s daily routine is complete until they do something related to chores.
This guideline is similar to the last one, but it pertains to toys and play.
There’s nothing mysterious about this.
There is no special sauce, phrase, or word that will make things simpler. And, unless you use natural cleansers, there isn’t much you can do to make your kids enthused about picking up.
There are numerous ways to accomplish this, but choose what works best in your home.
- You can’t go on to the next activity unless you finish the previous one.
- Allow for two messes before they have to clean it up. (I got that gem from this post, which I printed out and have on my desk)
- Establish cleaning schedules (before nap and before bed, for example)
- Set a timer for 10 or 15 minutes each day and ask everyone to help with cleanup.
- It doesn’t matter how you do it as long as you expect them to clean up their own messes. Even if they complain, they’ll feel good about it.
This helps kids master:
- Tidying skills
- Organization skills
- Work before play (or at least not ONLY play) mentality
The aim is to make it as simple as possible. Large baskets There will be no micromanagement, only macromanagement. They can rapidly go about their rooms and put away their toys. If it’s a toy with a lot of pieces, they can return it to its original box or another box you specify.
Unless YOU WANT TO CLEAN UP or your children are highly precise, systematic, and older, don’t colour coordinate otherwise you’ll have to do it all yourself. You know your children; if they are willing to maintain the colour coordination, go ahead and do it!
Rest is Key
For the introverted, the stay-at-home parent on the verge of burnout, or the easily overwhelmed… Rest is essential. This is a daily habit that your children must develop for your own sake.
And for their sake.
But that’s fine if it was only for you.
If you’re at home with your children all day, put them to sleep or rest at the same time. Then you can obtain at least a few hours of rest, peace and quiet, or alone time. After spending the morning with my five children (aged seven and younger), I am in desperate need of silence. I had to have it.
How to make rest happen:
- Set firm boundaries for older children. They can play quietly in their rooms, read books, or walk to a designated area, but they can’t be loud or leave the space you’ve assigned them.
- Place all babies and toddlers to sleep at the same time. This implies they must learn to sleep on their own. But you’ve got this. It will make your life much easier for a variety of reasons.
- Determine a reasonable time frame. It may be an hour or two, but go with what your kids can manage.
- Remember, they may resist at first (and they most certainly will), but they will eventually come to appreciate it. There is no sharing, no tampering with them, and no competing for supremacy. They rule their own universe.
- If everyone does not have their own room, choose any room in the home at random. Avoid having them rest together whenever feasible. It is unlikely to be relaxing.
Rest time is important if you work during the day and require 15 minutes of calm when you get home. If you don’t need it, bring it out as a means to offer everyone a quick recharge.
The kids are going to grow rowdy.
That’s great. It demonstrates that they have vitality, energy, and a desire to experience the enjoyable aspects of life.
There is also a time and place for being loud and wild, and you may need to quiet the kids down for a while. You’ll need some tricks up your sleeve if you start to feel like you’re losing it. You’ll be one step ahead if you can intercede before things get too loud and crazy.
Then, if you can incorporate these into your children’s typical daily routines around the time they always lose it, you’ll be 10 steps ahead.
Tips for recharging:
- Everyone takes a seat with a book. We will instruct our children to take a book (or five), find a seat, and read or look at pictures without talking. It does take some “shhhhing,” but they get it in the end.
- Time to go outside. Allow them to go about and play if they are loud, crazy, and hyper. Even if you have to supervise it for a while, noise outdoors isn’t as irritating as shouting inside.
- Together, read aloud. While you may want to be away from your children for peace and quiet, reading aloud together can be relaxing at times. They’ll calm down for a story, and you’ll remember them fondly now that they’re not racing around like crazy.
- Allow them a minute of noisy craziness before forcing them to stop. “Wow, you guys are really noisy. You’ve got a lot of things to say. I’ll set the timer for one minute and tell you to yell, scream, fuss, and stomp as loudly as you possibly can. We’re done after that.”
- Time alone. Even our children benefit from alone time. Allow them to go to their room with a favourite toy or two and reset if they simply can’t take being around everyone without freaking out, fussing, or screaming.
Do The Boring Stuff First
So… if you’re wondering how on earth I’m going to start these behaviours, I’d want to offer one more piece of advise.
Do the less fun first, then the more fun.
Do your duties before watching TV.
Clean up before going outside.
Do everything before watching TV.
This implies that you plan your day with toddlers and preschoolers such that they do the fun stuff after they do the hard stuff. If you will, work first and play later. If you’re stuck on ideas, take one of your child’s regular habits or rituals and place it in front of something fun they enjoy.
You can have some stinking peace and help if you’ve been feeling like a shell of a person and a slave to the small creatures you birthed.
Children will do what they have been taught (by us).
If you’ve unintentionally trained them to do nothing for themselves, you can intentionally (well, that’s not a term) train them to help out. To respect your need for some quiet.
You will be content.
They will feel more responsible and so happier as a result.
The house will be more efficient.