How you can raise a strong confident girl with a healthy self-image by building a strong foundation at an early age.
Confidence prepares children for a lifetime of success. Learn how to empower your daughter and lay a solid foundation for a bright future and handle mean girls like a pro.
I’m not the most self-confident person, but I’ve gone a long way since dealing with my own internal self-perception when I was a little girl. It’s important to me that my daughter ends up a strong woman so she can resist the peer pressure in the real world, and handle any gender stereotypes about her body image in the teen years.
This is not a simple task when it comes to raising girls today because there is always a form of media that will tell your little girl that her body is the wrong shape or that she needs to fulfill a certain role in her life.
Because I’m parenting one girl who watches and absorbs everything I do for her, this is something I have to work on on a daily basis so that I can raise a confident child with a positive image of herself and it starts at the home environment.
I’m no expert on my own confidence, but I’m working on it, and my hope is that the hard work I put in for myself will rub off on my daughter, making it easier for her to accept herself, how she speaks to herself, her abilities, characteristics, attitudes toward others, and even her own appearance with the kindness and love I never had for myself growing up.
Here are guaranteed ways to raise confident girls and strong daughters, according to parenting experts.
Girls Need A Role Model
My mother only complimented my abilities to be a good dancer as I grew up, but she would make derogatory comments about my physique to me and others, and she would compare my siblings and me in school, relationships, and other major life events.
Yet, as an adult, I can understand how her comments to take me down a notch were a knee-jerk response to her lack of confidence in herself.
Regrettably, I learnt early on that what mattered was how I looked, what I accomplished, and how others saw me. It had nothing to do with how I felt, my abilities, or who I was.
- Was I smart?
- Was I considerate?
- Was I resolute?
- Did I put in any effort?
I was all of these things, and this is where the focus should have been in order to grow my confidence and a building self-esteem, but it wasn’t, and as a 30-something woman with three children, working to alter the mentality I’ve had about myself for far too long isn’t easy.
It’s critical for me to focus on what’s on the inside of my children rather than what’s on the surface, and to offer disproportionate credit to their accomplishments rather than what it needed to reach their objectives.
I don’t want them to have to go through the same struggles I did in regaining my daughter’s confidence and discovering themselves. It took me a long time to achieve the confidence I now have, and I don’t want my daughter to go down the same twisting path I did.
Everyone wants to raise self-confident daughters, and there are a few things that can be a powerful influence to your daughter’s growth mindset and confidence.
How to Raise conﬁdent daughters
Let Her Pursue Her Interests
It’s critical to allow females to pursue their interests and participate in a variety of activities. Ask your daughter what she genuinely wants to do with her leisure time and follow her lead.
Modelling confident behavior is, without a doubt, easier said than done. Your child needs female role models to set a good example of a healthy self-image.
Your daughter looks to you, her Mama, to set an example, so be careful of how you act, speak about yourself, speak to her, and speak about others.
Even if you aren’t aware of it, your children are always watching you. It’s not going to go unnoticed what you say or how you treat yourself. She’ll notice if you make fun of your physique or how tight something fits, criticize your looks or profession, or even utter things like “I can’t.”
When you feel attractive and pleased of your accomplishments, she’ll notice.
You’ll start to notice the things your daughter says and feels about herself after the tables have turned. Take heed. Is it favourable, negative, or neutral?
She’ll be more inclined to feel confident herself if she sees you being confident. Positive affirmations are just as essential for moms as they are for children. Remember to try to avoid sending mixed messages to your child because that can get quite confusing and can erode confidence in the long run.
Cute and Pretty aren’t The Only Positive Attributes They Want To Have
Because girls are frequently described by their appearance — we’ve all heard “Aw, she’s so pretty!” a thousand times — it’s equally important to be conscious of how you congratulate your children.
Dr. Prete advises, “You should certainly tell your child that they are wonderful.” “However, you should also tell them they’re clever and confident by highlighting the internal qualities you admire.”
Give her space to fail
If your objective as a parent is to raise a strong, emotionally healthy girl, protecting her from every adversity won’t help. Our children’s confidence is cultivated by exposing them to adversity.
No parent wants their child to be wounded or to work hard and fail terribly at something. When we examine our personal strengths — the character traits we’ve built through time — we see that they’ve grown and strengthened as a result of a difficulty we’ve faced. Overcoming failure teaches us and our children resilience and endurance, and God helps us mature and build our confidence in Him through failure.
Don’t suffocate your daughter’s development by overprotecting her. Childhood is an ideal time for your daughter to learn the beautiful art of falling down, with the most essential lesson being the determination to get back up.
Show Body Positivity
When you talk about who you are, what you do, and how you feel about your body, your daughter will hear everything you say. Girls can read your body language and tell if you’re comfortable in your own skin or not.
It’s difficult not to complain about the things you don’t like about your body to others around you – or even when you believe you’re alone. We live in a society where the peer pressure to look a certain way, act a certain way, and be a certain way is overwhelming.
Of course, we compare ourselves to what we “believe” we should look and feel like…. but do you want your daughter to experience the same pressure around body positivity?
I may not feel completely at ease in a bikini after my third child, but I will never use the word fat or moan about my thighs or stomach in front of my children or when I’m alone. I also won’t hide behind cover-ups or avoid swimming, which gives the message that I’m not secure in my own skin.
It’s also crucial to discuss food in a positive light, without using phrases like “diet,” “fat,” “calories,” or “shouldn’t eat that.” These buzz phrases all imply the same thing, but when you explain what eating healthy looks like and how to make good and bad food choices for a healthy lifestyle rather than dieting, the topic shifts.
In the presence of children, the phrases “diet,” “thin,” and “fat” should never be used.
The Final Word…
Being at ease in your own skin will help your daughter feel at ease in hers, so fake it until you make it, for them.
See also: This Is To You – The Busy, Stressed Mom
Don’t Make Appearances A Huge Deal
Your daughter’s identity isn’t defined by her appearance or the clothes she wears. You don’t want to raise a daughter whose sense of self-worth is based only on her beauty and how she dresses.
Instead, her worth is determined by who she is. Praise your daughter for her compassion, determination, problem-solving skills, effort, and other good traits.
What is it about her that you admire? What are her advantages? Is she a good leader, does she put in a lot of effort in sports, and does she encourage her teammates? What is it that she enjoys and puts out additional effort in?
Daily reminders with positive affirmation cards for kids are one of my favorite ways to develop confidence in my children. I stuff them inside lunch boxes, front pockets of backpacks, and even simply leave them on top of their dresser or folded clothing.
Instead of focusing on how attractive she is or the form of her body, emphasize the good qualities that make her who she is.
Self-Worth Isn’t Measured By Accomplishments
When your child excels in athletics and academics, it’s natural to want to congratulate her on her achievements. It’s more vital to emphasize the effort and mental capacity she used to achieve her accomplishments and reach her objectives.
Hard effort, dedication, and the counter and tenacity to confront obstacles are what lead to victories and successes. Make a point of highlighting the talents and traits that helped her get there since this will go a long way toward improving her self-assurance.
Your daughter isn’t a standout athlete or has a decent grade. She’s a dedicated learner, a hard worker, a dreamer, and an intriguing person.
See also: 16 Awesome Signs You’re A Great Mom
Confident Women and conﬁdent daughters Don’t Compete With Other Women
To pull herself up, a confident woman does not need to talk or tear others down.
This is especially essential today when you’re trying hard to teach your daughter proper manners.
Don’t criticize or gossip about others, particularly about their looks, flaws, differences of opinion, or decisions. To teach your daughter empathy, focus on the positive qualities of people, offer them love, and constantly try to put yourself in their position.
Modelling behavior that raises people up, rather than tearing them down, and cheering them on encourages your daughter to look for the good in others.
Give praises and speak positively about women because if you speak negatively about them, your daughter is likely to do the same.
This kind of fixed mindset can be troublesome around social pressures, even around a good friend. The confidence of young girls can be taken away if the foundations are not strong.
When you applaud the high achievement and accomplishments of other women, you will be a fantastic role model.
Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.Eleanor Roosevelt
When children discover something they enjoy doing, they acquire confidence organically by encouraging talent. Allow your daughter to explore a variety of sports, school groups, and other activities until she discovers something she enjoys and can spend hours doing.
When children – and adults – are enthusiastic about their job, they work hard to attain their objectives.
Make sure to compliment your daughter on those qualities, not simply her achievements. This is what you should concentrate on if she had to achieve her goals via hard effort, perseverance despite failure, and times of stagnation in order to develop.
See also: How to Raise Creative Kids
Limit Media Exposure
Women are objectified in every form of media, including social media, television, movies, publications, and even literature. They’re too seductive, provocative, weak, and have a slew of other bad connotations, and social media is a hotbed for bullying and pulling people down.
When she is exposed to this sort of behavior and words, she will experience negative consequences such as comparing herself to others, body shaming, gossiping, and bullying.
Screen movies with caution and consider what messages you give your daughter access to.