Motherhood
Why Being Determined When It Comes To Parenting Is Essential

Why Being Determined When It Comes To Parenting Is Essential

It takes a long time for a child to develop. Parenting through tough periods and phases is not easy. Unfortunately, adulthood is not something that can be rushed. Perseverance has a lot of power in parenting.

We change our expectations as our environment advances quicker and faster. We want things to happen quickly, fast, fast…immediately without even recognizing it.

Unfortunately, we don’t use the word “quick” when it comes to parenting.

Development is a continuous procedure. It takes a long time for the brain to develop (25 years!). Maturity is not something that can be hastened. Children ultimately grow out of their phases.

There is no such thing as a fast fix.

It’s only reasonable to search for ways to expedite the procedure. Reward charts and punishments (operant conditioning)set by parents might give the impression that things are going quickly. On the other hand, these remedies generally stop functioning after a few weeks (or days!) since no number of stickers can make your child grow up quicker.

So, what are the choices?

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Why Being Determined When It Comes To Parenting Is Essential

It’s hardly a glamorous or showy response. Most parents, in fact, cringe a bit at this remark. We’d want something to expedite the process.

I understand. Waiting for your child to learn to sleep through the night or go to the potty on time is difficult. Waiting for your child to learn to share, exhibit empathy, or apologize on their own is difficult. Waiting for your child to learn how to manage their coursework, advocate for themselves, or make decisions based on consequences is difficult.

Things like this can happen. However, it will be part of your childrens timeline.

Meanwhile, your child requires your assistance. They require your participation in their growth and development.

Even when it’s difficult, and especially when you think things will never get better. 

Perseverance refers to a person’s willingness to stick with a task even though he would prefer to do something else or if the work gets tough. It can be the difference between a child giving up and one who succeeds in achieving his goals.

Children who persevere: The Cycle of Perseverance

  • They feel they are competent and capable of mastering their surroundings.
  • They are confident in their ability to deal with difficulties.
  • They view themselves as determined and focused.
  • They can be trusted because they follow through on their promises.
  • Make a list of objectives and work toward attaining them.
  • are more eager to explore new and tough circumstances and take chances.

5 Ways Parents Can Persevere

Adjust Expectations

Observe moments where you anticipate your child to be more mature or when your expectations exceed his or her ability. Reframe these views in a positive light: “His brain is still developing.” or “Mistakes are practised chances for her.” or “We’ve gotten through every stage so far; we’ll get through this one as well.”

Create Connections

As your child grows, your presence and attention may make a huge difference. Spend one-on-one time with your partner, try one of these easy connection suggestions, or simply put your phone aside to avoid being distracted. Older kids still need (and desire) to feel connected, recognized, and loved by their caretakers, even if it looks a bit different.

Build Parenting Skills

Rather of focusing on finding the “ideal punishment (fear conditioning)” for undesired behaviour, investigate why it is occurring in the first place. Children could be developmentally capable of doing a task but lack the essential abilities. Concentrate on instructing and guiding them, making each step as clear as possible, then stand aside and watch them gain confidence as they practise.

Get Support For Yourself

There’s no reason you should have to parent alone now that there are so many options available. Of course, asking for help necessitates vulnerability and honesty, and it’s perfectly fine if taking the initial step sounds daunting.

Get Support For Your Child

Even with all of your love, support, and encouragement, some children will require more assistance as they grow older. It can be difficult and even embarrassing to seek help for your kid. It doesn’t imply you did or are doing anything wrong; rather, it implies you’re doing a good job as a parent by providing your kid with the support they require.

Your kid will benefit from your patience as they develop, learn, make mistakes, and try again.

Persistence isn’t as exciting as same-day delivery, but it’s well worth the wait.

How Can Parents Foster Perseverance in Their Children

Part of a parent’s responsibility is to assist their children in developing the characteristics that will help them succeed. As your children’s most important teacher, you may utilize your influence to help them develop the crucial quality of persistence.

Praise your children for persevering with a tough activity or completing an assignment, even if they would rather be doing something else. Praise the effort, not the finished product. 

Explain to your child why the task, job, duty, project, or other activity is essential.

Make it clear to your children that you expect them to follow through on their promises.

When you are persistent, show your children what it is to be persistent. Demonstrate a positive outlook on problem-solving.

Use daily events to highlight examples of perseverance: news items, television shows, literature, and famous individuals your kids respect.

To avoid being overwhelmed, assist your children in setting objectives and breaking larger chores into smaller, more manageable chunks. Praise yourself for each successful step you take toward your ultimate objective.

Let them know it’s okay to make mistakes and that they’ll learn from them. After making a mistake, they may persevere and use what they’ve learned to help them go ahead.

Reframe tough activities as positive challenges that ought to be conquered.

What You Should Do Next:

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2. Register For A Pretty Awesome FREE 60-Minute Class:

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3. Sign Up For A 7 Step Positive Parenting Course

Enroll now in the most in-depth parenting class. After discovering these common sense, easy-to-implement, research-based tools you can learn how to:
  • Easily get kids to listen – the FIRST time. No yelling or reminding…not even once!
  • Put an end to daily power struggles. Bedtime became a breeze, and all the dawdling, chore wars, sibling rivalry, and mealtime meltdowns disappeared.
  • Reduce backtalk by HALF! It’s simple once you know the secrets of these two ‘buckets.’
  • Say goodbye to punishments that DON’T work. There’s a 5-step formula that works WAYYY better than time-outs.
  • Feel amazing, confident, and empowered as a parent, every day. I NEVER go to bed feeling guilty anymore! (Okay, well maybe sometimes…’ mom guilt’ is still a thing.)
Got a threenager? You want this class. Got an actual tween or teen? Then what are you waiting for? Sign up for the webinar right NOW and watch the BEST, most life-changing parenting video ever.

More Parenting Tips

References

  1. 2.Connell A, Bullock BM, Dishion TJ, Shaw D, Wilson M, Gardner F. Family Intervention Effects on Co-occurring Early Childhood Behavioral and Emotional Problems: A Latent Transition Analysis Approach. J Abnorm Child Psychol. Published online May 13, 2008:1211-1225. doi:10.1007/s10802-008-9244-6
  2. 3.Smokowski PR, Bacallao ML, Cotter KL, Evans CBR. The Effects of Positive and Negative Parenting Practices on Adolescent Mental Health Outcomes in a Multicultural Sample of Rural Youth. Child Psychiatry Hum Dev. Published online June 1, 2014:333-345. doi:10.1007/s10578-014-0474-2
  3. 4.Eisenberg N, Zhou Q, Spinrad TL, Valiente C, Fabes RA, Liew J. Relations Among Positive Parenting, Children’s Effortful Control, and Externalizing Problems: A Three-Wave Longitudinal Study. Child Development. Published online September 2005:1055-1071. doi:10.1111/j.1467-8624.2005.00897.x
  4. 5.Neppl TK, Conger RD, Scaramella LV, Ontai LL. Intergenerational continuity in parenting behavior: Mediating pathways and child effects. Developmental Psychology. Published online 2009:1241-1256. doi:10.1037/a0014850
  5. 6.Leidy MS, Guerra NG, Toro RI. Positive parenting, family cohesion, and child social competence among immigrant Latino families. Journal of Family Psychology. Published online 2010:252-260. doi:10.1037/a0019407
  6. 7.Riley AR, Wagner DV, Tudor ME, Zuckerman KE, Freeman KA. A Survey of Parents’ Perceptions and Use of Time-out Compared to Empirical Evidence. Academic Pediatrics. Published online March 2017:168-175. doi:10.1016/j.acap.2016.08.004
  7. 8.Gouveia MJ, Carona C, Canavarro MC, Moreira H. Self-Compassion and Dispositional Mindfulness Are Associated with Parenting Styles and Parenting Stress: the Mediating Role of Mindful Parenting. Mindfulness. Published online March 2, 2016:700-712. doi:10.1007/s12671-016-0507-y

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