50 Best Train Jokes for Kids
As a mom of three little adventurers, I’ve learned that there are a few things every parent should have on hand: snacks, an endless supply of patience, and, of course, a pocketful of jokes! My kids love everything about trains.
They’ve got train toys, train pajamas, and yes, we’ve even taken family trips to visit model train exhibits (you wouldn’t believe how fascinating those can be!).
So, when they’re getting restless or we’re waiting for the real train to come, I pull out my “train jokes for kids” stash. Laughter saves the day every single time.
These kid-friendly train jokes bring squeals of laughter in our house, and I’m so excited to share them with you.
Whether you’re planning a long trip, need a new bedtime routine, or just want a few laughs, here are 50 of the best train jokes that are sure to delight your little ones (and maybe you, too!).
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Train Jokes Kids Will Love
1. What do you call a train that sneezes?
- A choo-choo train!
2. Why did the train get in trouble at school?
- Because it had too many loco-motives!
3. What kind of train eats too much?
- A chew-chew train!
4. Why don’t trains ever get lost?
- Because they always follow their tracks!
5. What’s a train’s favorite candy?
- Choo-choo-late!
6. Why did the train break up with its girlfriend?
- She felt he was too controlling!
7. How did the little train learn to be brave?
- By thinking, “I think I can, I think I can!”
8. What’s a train conductor’s least favorite vegetable?
- Leeks!
9. Why did the train driver fall asleep?
- He was in a loco-motive mood!
10. What do trains wear to keep warm?
- Tracksuits!
11. Why don’t trains play hide-and-seek?
- Because good luck hiding a train!
12. How do trains stay in shape?
- They track their steps!
13. What’s a train’s favorite game?
- Monopoly – they love the railroads!
14. Why are trains always polite?
- Because they’re well trained!
15. What did the big train say to the little train?
- You choo-choose to be great!
16. Why did the train refuse to tell a joke?
- It was afraid it would go off the rails!
17. What’s a conductor’s favorite instrument?
- The sax-o-track!
18. How do trains greet each other?
- With a hearty, “Choo-choo!”
19. Why do trains make terrible comedians?
- Their timing is always off track!
20. Why was the train so shy?
- Because it couldn’t stop blushing at the station!
21. What kind of dog loves trains?
- A chew-chew-wawa!
22. Why did the train cross the road?
- To get to the other track!
23. How did the train become so strong?
- It worked on its loco-motion!
24. What did the train say when it saw a ghost?
- “I ain’t afraid of no loco-motive!”
25. Why did the train carry a map?
- To track its journey!
26. What did the train say to its conductor?
- “I choo-choose you!”
27. Why don’t trains like jokes?
- They always derail the conversation.
28. What’s a train’s favorite color?
- Track-tor green!
29. Why was the train so relaxed?
- It just went with the flow.
30. Why did the train take a nap?
- It was feeling a little steamed.
31. What’s a train conductor’s favorite dessert?
- Shortcake – because it’s always on track!
32. Why can’t trains keep secrets?
- They just choo-choo-choo too much!
33. How do you make a train happy?
- Give it a little engine-eering!
34. Why did the train fail its test?
- Because it didn’t know when to stop!
35. How did the little train win a race?
- It had a one-track mind!
36. Why was the train late for dinner?
- It got caught in a jam!
37. What do you call a clever train?
- A loco-genius!
38. How do trains remember things?
- They keep track!
39. Why was the train conductor always calm?
- Because he knew how to keep things on track!
40. Why don’t trains like baseball?
- They always strike out!
41. What did the train say to its tired friend?
- “I choo-choo you to take a rest!”
42. How do trains hear music?
- They use their track phones!
43. What did the train do at the circus?
- It went loco!
44. What’s a train’s favorite band?
- Loco-motion!
45. How do trains throw a party?
- They invite all the cars and get on track!
46. Why did the train need a tissue?
- It had a case of the choo-choos!
47. Why did the little train start dancing?
- It felt the loco-motion!
48. What’s a train’s favorite snack?
- Trail mix!
49. Why did the train stay up late?
- It wanted to catch the midnight express!
50. What did the train conductor say to his sweetheart?
- “You’re the light of my station!”
Bottom Line
And there you have it: 50 train jokes guaranteed to make your little ones giggle (and maybe roll their eyes once or twice)!
I know as a mom that a quick laugh can go a long way in keeping the day on track. These jokes are perfect for car rides, train trips, or even for keeping in your back pocket when you need a little laugh break.
For those train-obsessed kiddos, I highly recommend checking out this awesome train toy set on Amazon. It’s perfect for fueling their imaginations (and yes, it keeps them busy long enough for a quick coffee break).
Happy laughing and choo-choo-ing!
