Powerful Tips On How To Be An Intentional Parent

Learn purposeful parenting tricks on how to be an intentional parent and what that actually means.

When I became a parent, I was overwhelmed by the sheer amount of information and advice available on how to be a good parent.

I spent hours reading books, blogs, and forums, trying to figure out the “right” way to raise my child.

But as time went on, I realized that the most important thing wasn’t following a specific set of rules or guidelines – it was being intentional about my parenting.

By using a few key tools and resources, I was able to prioritize my family’s well-being, build stronger relationships with my child, and create a more fulfilling family life…and you can too!

As a parent, it can be easy to fall into the trap of simply going through the motions day after day.

However, intentional parenting is an approach that emphasizes being mindful and purposeful in how you raise your children.

While intentional parenting can be a challenge, there are many tools available that can help make it easier.

In this blog post, we’ll explore some of the most important tools for intentional parenting, and discuss how they can help you build a stronger relationship with your child and raise them in a more intentional way.

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What Is Intentional Parenting

Intentional parenting is an approach to raising children that emphasizes deliberate and thoughtful actions by parents in guiding their child’s growth and development. In a quick-fix world, where immediate solutions to problems are often sought, intentional parenting takes a different route. It is about recognizing that being an exceptional parent and fostering strong parent-child relationships are not quick fixes, but rather a continuous process.

Intentional parenting involves being a role model for your child, consistently demonstrating the values and behaviors you want them to emulate. It means making a conscious effort to create strong connections with your child and actively engaging in their life, even when you have a busy schedule.

Cathy Fields, a regular contributor and frequent guest writer on parenting, emphasizes that the essence of intentional parenting lies in recognizing that there is no such thing as a perfect parent. Instead, it’s about having good intentions and taking practical steps to have a positive impact on your child’s life.

In a world where quick fixes may seem tempting, intentional parenting stands as a reminder that meaningful connections and healthy relationships are built over time. It is not about applying duct tape solutions to a child’s behavior, but about addressing issues in a way that teaches life lessons and problem-solving skills. This approach recognizes that children are not simply shaped by thin air but by the consistent actions and influences of their parents.

One of the cornerstones of intentional parenting is creating a peaceful home environment. This means establishing clear rules and boundaries that are consistently enforced. It also involves setting aside reading time, quality family moments, and teachable moments where you can impart values and wisdom to your child.

Intentional parenting extends beyond just the immediate concerns and looks towards the child’s future. It recognizes that the parent-child relationship is the child’s first and most influential connection to the world. Hence, nurturing a healthy marriage, modeling godly behaviors, and actively shaping a child’s environment are integral parts of this approach.

How To Be An Intentional Parent

1. Be a Role Model: One of the best ways to be an intentional parent is to lead by example. Recognize that you are your child’s first and most influential role model. Demonstrate the values, behaviors, and virtues you want your child to emulate.
2. Build Strong Connections: Prioritize building strong connections and relationships with your child. Take the time to get to know them on a deeper level, engage in their interests, and listen to their thoughts and feelings. Strong parent-child relationships are the foundation of intentional parenting.
3. Recognize There’s No Quick Fix: Understand that there are no quick fixes in intentional parenting. It’s a long-term commitment that requires consistent effort and dedication to your child’s well-being.
4. Teach Life Lessons: Instead of applying quick fixes to your child’s behavior, focus on teaching them valuable life lessons and problem-solving skills. Use teachable moments as opportunities to impart wisdom.
5. Model a Godly Marriage: If applicable, cultivate a godly marriage within your family. A healthy marriage serves as a model for your child of what a loving and respectful relationship should look like.
6. Create a Peaceful Home: Establish a peaceful and nurturing home environment by setting clear rules and boundaries that are consistently enforced. Prioritize quality family time, reading time, and other meaningful activities.
7. Nurture Their Environment: Be mindful of the environment your child is exposed to. Surround them with positive influences and experiences that contribute to their growth in a healthy way.
8. Prioritize Your Child’s Future: Remember that your role as a parent is to shape your child’s future. Be forward-thinking and consider the long-term impact of your actions on your child’s life.
9. Reflect on Your Own Childhood: Take time to reflect on your own childhood experiences and how they may influence your parenting. Recognize both the positive and negative aspects, and use this reflection to inform your own intention as a parent.
10. Start Each Day with Intentions: Begin each day with the intention to be an exceptional parent. Set goals for yourself in terms of how you want to interact with your child and the values you want to instill in them.
11. Seek Support and Guidance: Don’t hesitate to seek support and guidance when needed. Learn from experts, like Cathy Fields, a regular contributor and frequent guest writer on parenting. There’s no shame in asking for help when facing challenges.
12. Trust in Your Good Intentions: Trust that your good intentions as a parent will guide you in making the right choices for your child. Believe in the positive impact you can have on their life.
13. Recognize It’s a Difficult Challenge: Understand that intentional parenting can be a difficult challenge, but it’s also one of the most rewarding responsibilities you’ll ever have. Embrace the journey with determination.
14. Avoid Duct Tape Solutions: Instead of applying quick fixes to problems, work on addressing the root causes of your child’s behavior. This leads to more meaningful and lasting solutions.
15. Create Teachable Moments: Foster an environment where every moment is a potential teaching opportunity. Use everyday situations to impart values and wisdom to your child.
16. Consider the Child’s Brain Development: Be aware of your child’s brain development at different stages. Tailor your parenting approach to their age and cognitive abilities.
17. Make Time for Reading: Reading time is essential for your child’s cognitive development and can also be a wonderful bonding activity. Set aside time for reading together.
18. Understand Your Greatest Responsibility: Recognize that your greatest responsibility as a parent is to nurture and guide your child. Your actions and choices have a profound impact on their future.

Examples Of Intentional Parenting

Intentional parenting is a thoughtful and deliberate approach to raising children, emphasizing the creation of lasting and meaningful connections between parents and their offspring.

Unlike quick-fix parenting, which focuses on addressing immediate problems with immediate solutions, intentional parenting looks at the bigger picture.

It involves prioritizing quality time spent with your children, actively listening to their thoughts and feelings, setting clear boundaries, teaching them problem-solving skills, and modeling positive behavior through your own actions.

Intentional parenting includes reflecting on your own childhood experiences to inform your parenting choices and making time for family traditions that strengthen the family bond.

It also involves practicing patience, empowering your children to make age-appropriate decisions, and creating an environment where questions are encouraged and second chances are given.

For those with spiritual or religious beliefs, intentional parenting may involve passing on these values through prayer, meditation, or discussions about moral and ethical principles.

Expressing love and affection, planning for your child’s future, and supporting their interests are integral components of intentional parenting. It also entails apologizing when you’re wrong, demonstrating humility, and teaching children the importance of taking responsibility for their actions.

In essence, intentional parenting is a holistic approach that recognizes the long-term impact of every action, word, and choice made in raising children. It aims to foster strong, loving, and resilient individuals who carry the lessons and values instilled by their parents throughout their lives.

References

1. Pre-Parent Discipline Intentions: Fleming and Borrego (2019) investigated the impact of discipline experiences and acceptability on future discipline strategies among pre-parent undergraduate students. They found that discipline experiences may indirectly affect discipline intent through discipline acceptability for both positive and aggressive strategies (Fleming & Borrego, 2019).
2. Communication in Early Intervention: Popova, O’Brien, and Taylor (2022) explored therapist-parent communication in early intervention (EI) using the Intentional Relationship Model (IRM). The study identified opportunities for practitioners to improve family-centered practices, particularly in sharing information and expanding the use of collaborative, problem-solving, and advocating modes (Popova, O’Brien, & Taylor, 2022).
3. Vaccine Intention–Behaviour Relationship: Auslander et al. (2018) analyzed the relationship between parents’ vaccine intentions and behaviors, highlighting the role of intention characteristics and planning processes in vaccination decision-making (Auslander et al., 2018).
4. Charity-Driven Framework in Youth Sports: Bean et al. (2021) reflected on the Play Better framework, an intentional approach incorporating prosocial behavior in youth sports. Coaches perceived the framework to positively influence youth’s psychosocial development and life skills transfer (Bean et al., 2021).
5. Parent Engagement in Parenting Education: Mirzadegan, Blanton, and Meyer (2022) examined an engagement strategy including neuroscience information in parenting education. They found that this approach enhanced parental intent to enroll and interest in learning new parenting skills (Mirzadegan, Blanton, & Meyer, 2022).
6. Universal Prevention of Child Behavioral Disorders: Hahlweg and Schulz (2019) assessed the long-term effectiveness of the Triple P Positive Parenting Program, finding improvements in child behavior and relationship satisfaction from mothers’ perspectives (Hahlweg & Schulz, 2019).