You take the kids out to do enjoyable things throughout the holidays, give them toys, clothes, and books, and attempt to give them meaningful experiences all around. You arrive prepared to bake cookies, wrap presents, pack luggage, and remove scratchy tags from clothes. That is exactly what parents do.
Then the Christmas vacation is gone, and you’re left with gloomy feelings, a lack of thankfulness, and a general dissatisfaction with life. It’s the kids’ sighs and eyerolls that grate on your nerves.
They appear to be craving more, more, more.
Not to mention the inevitable “Is that it?” collapse.
You might be wondering where you went wrong – why can’t your child be appreciative for what they have?
Why Kids Lose Their Cool After Busy Holidays
Children misbehave during the holidays for the same reasons they misbehave throughout the year. The holidays often seem to make things worse because parents typically feel the brunt of their children’s misbehaviour at family gatherings and holidays.
So, what causes children to misbehave? Children act out when they don’t know how to manage basic life problems.
And the holidays might provide us with a greater number of these issues to address, which is why behavioural issues may appear to be more severe during this time.
For example, suppose your son refuses to eat supper at Grandma’s place. He would rather stay at home and play video games. As a result, he acts out and becomes enraged.
His issue is that he prefers to stay at home. And he tries to address the situation with a tool he believes will work, and which has in the past: he yells and screams that he doesn’t want to go.
Sometimes a child’s stress is caused by a change in routine, or by holiday excitement or anticipation, and they just don’t know how to cope. For younger children, there may be worry over doing something properly or incorrect in order to obtain this item or game. When kidss don’t know how to deal with their problems properly, they’ll use every trick in the book to acquire what they want.
These children must acquire more effective problem-solving techniques. They learn these better approaches through being held accountable for their current actions while also receiving coaching on how to act more responsibly in the future.
How You Can Help Your Child Manage Those Holiday Meltdowns
Be their safe space
When your children are acting out, YOU, mom and dad, are their safe haven. With all of their eyerolls, sighs, and complaints about “never getting to do anything!” they can come to YOU.
YOU, mom and dad, are the emotional garbage collectors and sounding boards for discovering a better path.
Where else can kids go if they can’t go to their parents when they’re having a hard time?
Provide Emotional Support
It always starts with the parents – with us. Kids are incapable of operating at the maturity level required to disrupt a behaviour pattern, much alone intervene.
That’s why it’s critical to be present when children are having the greatest difficulty, to provide counsel in a way that they will understand.
When a child acts out, they are essentially conveying to you, “I’m having trouble dealing with this.” “Are you willing to assist me?”
Kids don’t have the language abilities to express themselves in that way, but I assure they desire your support (even if they show it in the most unloving ways).
Get Back To Routines
It’s critical that you take your child’s word for it before you do anything else. Take a moment to enter their world and roam about in it. Consider how things may be viewed from their point of view.
See also: How To Use The Child Ego State To Connect With Your Kids
It merely signifies that you comprehend, and this is critical for children to open up to your direction. When children feel heard and understood, they will begin to pay attention to what you are saying.
Now that you have something to work with, you may begin discussing better strategies to deal with their views, as well as including things like…
- Performing a month’s worth of acts of kindness (being nice isn’t something that just happens. It needs a great deal of experience).
- Get the kids to help with chores (Kids who participate in household chores have a far better understanding and appreciation for all the work that goes into holiday events).
- Allow your children to have an active role in developing their morning, night, and mealtime routines (when kids feel like an active participant, they feel more in control and are more willing to cooperate).
- Read books on thankfulness and kindness.
- Assist children in learning about money and spending (so they can understand and appreciate how much gifts and travel cost).
- Help kids learn to effectively understand and share their feelings.
Slow Down On The Sugar Intake
In the month of December, I need to gain at least 10 pounds. It feels like every time you turn, a charming Christmas delicacy is being thrust into your mouth (although by your own hands). Your children are also cramming their mouths!
You should be aware of how sugar affects your child’s mood and conduct. When sugar excess occurs, some kids become more emotional, energetic, and prone to anger.
Give Your child Something To Look Forward To
The Christmas season is similar to a massive wave that builds momentum from Halloween to New Year’s Day before crashing on January 1st. All the holiday fun is done when you have one more week off with the kids. This might trigger holiday withdrawals in both you and your children.
Having a nice activity scheduled for after the holidays will assist with the season’s end anticlimax. Plan a special gathering, walk, or adventure for the week following Christmas. This will aid in the holiday detox process as well as provide the kids with something to look forward to during their vacation.
See also: 4 Common Reasons Children Become Ungrateful
Supporting Your Child Through Their Post Holiday Meltdowns Bottom Line
It may take some time, but your child will learn that furious outbursts will no longer work with you if you remain calm and clear in your role modelling.
The fact is that transformation is difficult and takes time. Just be consistent, keep your child accountable, and model appropriate behaviour for them. As a consequence of your efforts, your family’s holidays, as well as the rest of the year, will be better.
Your child will be happier and more equipped for life as a result.