How To Avoid Mom Burnout When Raising Teens Alone
Do you ever feel like you might be all alone in the world? I get how that can feel so awful when you’re the only one trying to raise a teenager while balancing all things in life as well.
I struggle with parental burnout sometimes and I have a spouse who helps out around the house and with parenting, I cannot even imagine the hardships single parents go through.
If you’re a single parent, you’re literally a rockstar.
So let’s get into how you can avoid burnout as a single parent, especially if you’re raising a teenager.
Parental burnout is the physical, mental, and emotional exhaustion that one feels from the chronic stress of parenting,
Dr. Puja Aggarwal, a board certified neurologist and certified life coach tells Healthline.
While burnout affects everyone differently, common signs include loss of motivation, exhaustion, detachment, headaches, and feelings of hopelessness — to highlight just a few.
While any parent can experience stress and burnout, the unique challenges that arise during adolescence can make parenting as a single mother even more difficult.
Resources and a sense of community, however, can prove to be invaluable to a single mom’s health and wellness — from those that help facilitate a healthy routine to the value role that therapy can play.
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Building an effective support network
Self care is essential in order to successfully manage stress as a single mom. In addition to taking time for yourself, having a strong support network plays a major role for any parent.
According to the University of Rochester Medical Center, studies show that spending just 90 minutes a week with a group of other single parents can help improve your quality of life.
Other advantages include having a safe space to share experiences and feelings, getting tips from those in similar situations, and making friendships — to name just a few.
While friends and family can make for a great support network, there are several options for single moms to find supplemental support both locally and online for single parents.
Your local YMCA (or YWCA), faith centers, public libraries, and hospitals are a few places worth reaching out to who may have programs in place for single mothers, according to the University of Rochester post, though online resources (like support groups on social media) are another great way to connect with other single moms.
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Creating a healthy routine
For single mothers and their teens, a routine can provide both predictability and stability. A Northwestern Medicine post highlights the many advantages associated with routines, noting that they can help individuals manage stress more effectively, sleep better, eat healthier, and get active.
For teens, however, the presence of a routine can actually help set them up for success in the long run.
Researchers at the University of Georgia found that teens with more family routines during adolescence had higher rates of college enrollment, and were less likely to use alcohol in young adulthood — to highlight a couple of positive outcomes of the research that was published in the Journal of Adolescent Health.
Establishing a routine as a single mom can seem nearly impossible — especially if you’re already juggling a full schedule.
Integrating small, healthy habits, however, can make the incorporation of a routine much easier.
Making it a point to eat meals together while discussing one another’s day is just one proactive idea, while the integration of healthy habits like regular tutor sessions can help provide stability academically.
87% of parents of children under the age of 18 report that back-to-school season causes them stress or anxiety, according to findings from Understood’s “Back-To-School Stress Study” conducted online by The Harris Poll.
Parents of those who experience learning and thinking differences (such as those who are neurodivergent or have been diagnosed with ADHD, dyslexia, or dyscalculia) are more likely than other parents to say they feel stressed (39% vs. 28%, respectively).
While the back-to-school season brings change to any parent’s life, academic challenges can make things even more stressful, especially for single moms who wish to support their teens throughout their education.
Helping out with homework every day may not always a realistic possibility.
Tutoring, however, can become a valuable resource that can provide your teen with quality academic help while giving you a break.
Tutoring is a great solution for any teen who is experiencing difficulties in the classroom, whether the goal is to maintain a certain grade in a specific subject or simply gain the tools that can facilitate greater understanding of complex topics (like basic study skills).
Safety is a major aspect of hiring the right person for the job — in addition to the basics, such as qualifications and experience, a criminal record check is essential when planning to invite the tutor into your home.
After assessing the safety of a prospective tutor, a sit-down interview is paramount in order to find the right person — by having your teen in attendance, you can determine whether a good working relationship is possible (all the while addressing any questions).
The value of therapy
The American Psychological Association (APA) highlights several typical areas of parent-teen conflict, such as the teen’s choice of friends, school and work performance, dating and sexuality, clothing and makeup, and self-destructive behaviors such as smoking, drinking, and doing drugs.
Additional stressors, such as shared custody arrangements and co-parenting can make figuring out and managing conflict even more overwhelming.
Therapy is a great way to not only manage the stress that comes along with being a single mom, but can help you address and maintain mental health and wellness so that you can continue parenting in a healthy way.
Family therapy is another option, and can be an avenue worth exploring if things at home feel particularly challenging.
According to the Cleveland Clinic, family therapy can help address a variety of concerns, including strained relationships between family members, stress, anger, communication issues, and coping with changes such as divorce.
Stress can become overwhelming for single mothers of teens, and can lead to burnout if not remedied.
When looking for a sense of community and valuable resources, there are no shortage of options — from online resources to support groups.
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