10 Signs You’re Mastering Motherhood (Even If You Feel Like You’re Failing)
I sat at my computer after a long day of mothering and working on completing my to-do list and smiled as I heard my children laughing, playing with lego, and using their imaginations.
I felt like, even though bedtime was a little bit late, I had WON the day.
No one broke any bones, everyone was fed, the kids are happy, and I’m at peace.
But that feeling of joy slipped away pretty quickly when I remembered all the things I didn’t do that day, and I did not feel like I was mastering motherhood.
I’m sure you agree with me… motherhood is HARD!
YOU are doing a fantastic job as a mother.
I already know this, since you’re here reading this post, but let me show you other reasons why you are in fact, rocking’ this motherhood thing
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At the end of a very long day of motherhood, do you ever take a moment to reflect on how your parenting was that day?
Does mastering motherhood seem like an impossible thing?
Unfortunately, we all get these thoughts at the end of each day that creeps up;
- I didn’t get enough accomplished today
- I should have reacted better at this situation
- What did I even do all day? I’m exhausted!
And then you may start to think you’re doing a horrible job as a parent and wonder if your kids had a terrible day because of something you did.
This is your brain stopping you from finding the joy in motherhood. Your head fills with regrets and feelings of incompetence.
If this is you at the end of your day…STOP!!!
STOP right now. Stop Today! These thoughts are horrible, bad, terrible, the worst!
What Does Motherhood Mean?
Let’s dive into a simple version of this pretty loaded questions.
I mean, motherhood is so complex, I have so much to say about it, I could write a book!
But let’s keep it simple for today because I know you’re here to find out the ten reasons you’re rocking motherhood. I really want to go over the meaning of motherhood first.
According to dictionary.com:
[ muhth -er-hoo d ]
the state of being a mother; maternity.
The qualities or spirit of a mother.
It seems to me that according to the dictionary, mothers only have one job: possessing the qualities and spirits of a mother.
As if motherhood isn’t hard enough, we have to figure out what the heck that means too?
The dictionary would run out of room for other words to define if they went on about the role of motherhood, so I won’t get too hard on their short attempt at defining motherhood.
So what does motherhood really mean? (outside of the dictionary definition)
Motherhood is a hard, yet rewarding job that most humans crave to do. It is selfless and full of love. It is full of sacrifice and joy.
Motherhood is raising humans that are going to contribute to society one day… (motherhood is maybe teaching them skills so that they don’t have to take adulting classes when they go to college?..
That’s a thing now…crazy right?!)
Our brains were developed to be able to survive through stressful situations, but not thrive during them.
It’s kind of like being productive but not emotionally and intentionally engaged in enjoying our roles in motherhood.
No one can really ever be truly prepared for motherhood.
Honestly, there is no one mothering journey that is the same and all the tips and advice on being a mom that is out there will not be able to cover it all.
Signs That You’re Mastering Motherhood
You’re always looking to be better
If you’re a mother who is reading articles on how you can help your children blossom into adults or if you’re looking into healthy lunches for school, then you’re rocking’ motherhood.
You’re trying to be a good parent. You’re trying to provide the best for your child, and you’re always learning and growing.
That is a huge deal! Even if you’re browsing on Pinterest and an inspirational mommy article pops up, and you read it, you’re already filling your head with motherhood power that dives you toward being an amazing mommy.
(By the way, thanks for stopping by!)
You can find excellent parenting articles online, and the best are usually posts written by experienced moms who are not following all the child-raising trends.
You are always looking for crafts and fun activities for your kids
If you’re trying to fill your childrens day with activities that stretch beyond TV, you’re rocking’ motherhood.
You want to educate, engage, and have fun with your child. But don’t think you’re failing if you let them watch TV either!
Like I said, not mommy shaming, we are all doing our best surviving in the wild of motherhood.
Your house isn’t perfectly clean and it’s pretty noisy too
I said it! You don’t have to spend every minute of every day, making sure your house is sparkling.
Just do the basics and keep things neat-ish, and you’re doing just fine.
Kids make messes and cleaning up after every mess is just plain exhausting…ain’t nobody got time for that!
While I do have an excellent cleaning routine for busy moms (the exact way I clean my own home in just 20 – 30 min a day) … it’s not the clean home that makes you a great mom.
(Whoever said mom meant housekeeper anyway…)
And the noise? It means that kids are having fun (ego state).
Wouldn’t you much rather listen to noise and laughter and knowing the kids are enjoying themselves rather than the sound of silence where the kids are fully zoned in on electronics?
Yep, the noise is OK!
Your children feel loved
If your children feel safe and loved in their home, you’re rocking motherhood.
Providing a comfortable environment for little ones to grow up in is one of the most important things that you can do for your kid!
Here are some ways you can make your children feel loved at home:
Provide companionship – spend alone time with your kids and build respect and closeness.
Tell your children how special they are how much you love them. Each child is unique and special, and each one should get told they are enjoyed daily.
I know a lot of the time as moms, we tend to throw orders at our children instead of engaging in conversations.
The more you engage in conversations, the more closely your child will feel with you.
Show your child respect through your tone of voice and acts of listening.
If you are on the phone all day and they cannot get your attention, that is not showing that you respect your children.
Respect is an essential thing to teach children as part of their developing mannerisms.
Your heart lights up when you see your kids
I know I cannot spend a whole lot of time away from my kids.
When I was working full time outside of the home, I could not wait to hug my kids at the end of the day.
Whether you are a working mom or a stay at home mom, if you love to hug your kids and see them smiling at you, you’re doing a great job at this mom thing.
Related: How To Be A Calm Mom
You want your kids to do well in school and check in with their teachers
Do you care about their performance at school?
Do you want them to have decent grades and make nice friends? Then you, Momma, are doing fantastic.
No, this doesn’t make you a helicopter parent; it just makes you a caring one.
I hate those parenting labels anyway, can’t we BE PARENTS these days…why label?
You look for ways to communicate with them better when you’re presented with a challenge
Sometimes children present you with behaviour that is very challenging to deal with.
Sometimes getting kids to open up and communicate is difficult.
You look for ways you can make your time alone with them as special as possible
Sometimes life gets busy, and little moments of quality time can be difficult to find.
Looking for ways to make little moments special and creating memories with your children makes you a great Momma.
The simple act of being silly and playing with your children is enough to create many lasting memories.
It also strengthens the bond between parents and children, which in turn creates children who are more willing to listen!
You’ve so got this.
You try to limit screen time
Limiting screen time is a hard thing to do these days.
I was just discussing with my husband all the different devices we have in our home that my children could possibly play with.
There are devices to try to avoid in every room! We didn’t mean for this to happen, but hey, it did, and we aren’t perfect.
Trying to get children not to be addicted to these devices is the challenge.
Providing your kids with other activities to keep their minds occupied is an essential aspect of parenting.
If you’re a Mom who is trying her best to keep the kids off the electronics, then you are doing a great job…(we all know it’s not an easy task).
You want to raise them to be responsible and honest individuals who will benefit society.
As parents, it is our job to raise people who will contribute to society by making sure to teach your kids manners, responsibility, and kindness is what it’s all about.
Sure, academics are important.
Yes, being good at a sport or two is important…but nothing beats raising a kid who has good family values and kindness in their heart.