Being a stay at home mom can get overwhelming. Being a working mom is hard too, don’t get me wrong. I think this parenting gig is difficult no matter what you’re doing but since I’ve been a stay at home mom for the last 4 years, I had a few things I wanted to share.
I have a wonderful husband who helps out, I take time for self care and I haven’t really had any life changing events that have brought my spirits down in the last little while.
Even so, the struggle of being a stay at home mom with 3 little kids has hit me hard.
Here are some hard truths about being a stay at home mom.
Truths About Being A Stay At Home Mom
Some Parenting Days Knock You Down
It won’t happen right away on the first day. Because your tank is initially full enough to get you through. And it won’t happen in the middle of a crisis since you’ll be in survival mode.
It will happen on a routine day when the sum of all things mom will dump like garbage into your lab, and you will realise you’ve had enough.
You’re going to snap. This is very normal. At some time in our lives, we all turn into a cranky mother. It’s how we move forward that matters the most.
You’re Needed All The Time
Someone is always screaming out for you in a desperate manner. Tears as the fork falls from the table. When one child touches the other, tears flow. And the other generally adds a few tears just for good measure. You sing while waving your hands in the air like a conductor.
Your small ones rely on you in every manner possible. They want you to be right there with them through it all. On the same day. Always.
There’s also your spouse to consider. He, too, requires your assistance. It’s not because he wants to learn the letters or sing Mary Had a Little Lamb.
Your Needs Are Put Aside
The necessities of your family trump your deepest desires, needs, and wants. Your lunch with pals has been replaced with your child throwing macaroni in your face. Your luxurious shower has been replaced with your child peeing in the tub. For the next three years, your evenings of unbroken sleep will be replaced by waking up every two hours.
You eventually fade into obscurity as a relic of your former existence.
You set out a few hours for yourself, but it never feels like enough. Because you’ll be back in the trenches of parenthood before you know it. You’ve been zapped yet again.
You Get To Do Everything Many Times Over
Your house is never clean, despite the fact that you clean all the time. Even though you cook frequently, someone constantly refuses to eat. It’s not because your kids don’t clean up after themselves or eat their vegetables.
It’s because they’re small children.
It’s because they’re not equipped to be a full-service provider.
You’ll Miss These Days One Day
Even when you want to run away and feel like you’re walking on a bed of nails in your own home, you know without a doubt that you’ll miss your days as a stay-at-home mom.
You’ll wish that your offspring were still young and small so that you could be wrapped up in them. You’ll wish they’d “need you like they used to” again. You’ll wish that things could just go back to the way they were.
This is how we were created by nature. Parenting periods can be difficult, much like childbirth (or a bad hangover). Because you recall the pleasure, you forget about the pain.
Being A Stay At Home Mom Is Joyful, But Hard
It’s rewarding, it’s wonderful, it’s amazing but it’s hard. So hard.
If you find motherhood to be difficult, you’re not alone. I don’t know the actual stats, I guess I could look it up, but from my heart I’m pretty sure it’s like 90% of mothers feel this same way.
I see it on social media. I see it among my friends – what little friends I have since becoming a mother.
So hang in there, once your kids are a little bit older, you’ll have different challenges to get through, and you’ll get through them all. Then one day, the house will be so quiet you’ll long for the days of chaos…that’s what I hear anyway.
You’ve got this. And you’re not alone.
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