How To Create A Toddler Bedtime Routine

Table of Contents

How to create a regular bedtime routine for toddlers so you can create good sleep habits and eliminate sleep problems.

Do your young children give you a hard time around bedtime? My kids used to as well, so the things I’m going to share with you are real life advice from a mom of 3 on making a consistent bedtime routine.

To get to point quickly, successful bedtimes start with solid routines, positive attitudes and calm environments without bright lights. That’s all well and good, but how do you create a routine, how do you maintain a positive attitude when the kids aren’t listening, and how the heck do we get kids to calm down when the mention of bedtime seems to send them into hyper active mode?

I don’t have all the answers for you. Remember that I’m a mom who’s been there, done that, and not a professional sleeping coach so some strategies that worked for me, may not work for you. However, it can’t hurt to try my methods since they HAVE worked in the past.

This post may contain affiliate links. Full privacy policy and disclosure here.

Why Is It Important To Create A Bedtime Routine For Toddlers?

You might be thinking that a routine for toddler bedtime might not be necessary. However, routine can trigger the body to knowing what comes next, and in a bedtime routine we want to trigger sleep.

The association between having a bedtime routine and sleep was dose-dependent, indicating that the better the kid’s sleep quality was the younger the child was when the routine was begun and the more nights the bedtime routine was employed.

To put it another way, the earlier you start and the longer you stick to a nighttime routine, the better (and longer) sleep you’ll get!

The advantages of a solid bedtime routine also extend to other areas of your child’s life. A consistent nighttime routine has been shown to improve parent-child connection, language development, and emotional and behavioural regulation.

How To Plan Out A Bedtime Routine

Before you can successfully create a bedtime routine, you have to consider some factors that may affect the way the routine will go.

How Many Hours Of Sleep Does Your child Need?
Does your child still nap during the day or do they stay awake until bedtime?
What Time Should Your Child Go To Bed?
You can figure out what time you need to put your child to bed based on the time they need to wake up in the morning.
Decide Where The Child Will Be Going To Sleep
Will your child be sleeping in their own bed, your bed or a family bed? Establishing a sleep location can help set the bedtime standard by keeping consistency in the routine.
When Does Dinner End?
Making sure that dinner time and bedtime are far enough apart is important too. Dinners that are too close to bed can cause wakefulness in a child.

Once you have those things established, it is time to write out your toddler’s bedtime routine. If your routine is written down on paper, or even in routine chart form, you are more likely to stick to the structure that you have set out.

Be sure to include everything from dinner time, to bath time to the moment they fall asleep so that the whole evening can run like clockwork as much as possible.

If you are having trouble figuring out what time you should put the child to bed, working backwards may help.

Take a look at the amount of time it could take to complete all of the tasks on your written list and work backwards from the ideal time you would like your kids to fall asleep so you can get rid of bedtime battles.

For example:

Dinner is at 6 pm which means that bedtime should start around 730 at the earliest. Bedtime will include winding down with 15 minutes of independent play without screens followed by a toy cleanup. Then when everything is clean we will want to have a quick bath for 15 minutes. After bath it will be around 8 00. At 8 we will brush teeth and climb into bed for story time. Stories will take 10 minutes and then a 5 minute cuddle after that. Bedtime routine should end at 830.

However you want to structure the baby bedtime routine is up to you, this is just an example of what you might want your routine to look like timing-wise. Your child may need to be asleep by 8 instead of 8:30 so work out the best routine to accommodate that timeline.

example of a bedtime routine

To help you further with how to make a bedtime routine for your toddler, here is how our typical evening goes for my 2 boys. This routine started when my oldest child was just 2, and is still the same today at age 7.

My children thrive on routines so much so that we use charts for everything in our lives including a getting ready for school chart, an after school chart, and even a snack choice chart for bedtime snacks! My fridge is full of charts which we use daily.

Our bedtime routine starts an hour and a half after dinner time. We try to eat around 6pm, if we go later we still keep bedtime the same. We have a no screen time after dinner policy in our home which is recommended by our pediatrician.

The kids like to run around outside and get wild and crazy until bedtime routine begins and then we do try to wind down with some quiet time.

So at 7:30 it all starts and at 830 it ends when my kids were young toddlers. It’s still very similar now, but they do have a slightly later bedtime.

Kids stop playing and hop into the bath or have a shower. They shower or bath separately so this can take up to 30 minutes to get done.
After washing up, we have bedtime snacks that the children choose from their bedtime snack chart. (menu includes cheese and crackers, a bowl of cereal, yogurt and berries, waffles and peanut butter or eggs done up different ways) If the kids are extra hyper I like to give them cool chamomile tea.
After bedtime snack, it’s time to brush those teeth. Teeth brushing is supervised and done together to ensure it gets done properly, even at age 7.
After brushing their teeth the children grab their nighttime water bottles and fill them with fresh water.
Then it’s time to read a bedtime story or read an educational book about space, the human body or something else. My kids are little scientists so they love to learn.
After story, it’s lights out and snuggles with teddy bears.
I also like to sing songs during snuggle time like twinkle twinkle little start and baa baa black sheep for a few minutes.
After the snuggles, it’s time to leave the bedroom whether they are asleep or not. By now they are calm enough to fall asleep on their own and no shenanigans will go on. I notice shenanigans do happen when I allow screen time after dinner though, so be mindful of when their last screen time is before bed so they can get a good nighttime sleep.

Tips for A Better Bedtime Routine For Your Toddler

Keep Your Child’s Bedtime Routine Short

An excessive amount of bedtime rituals might have the opposite effect and increase anxiety.

Whatever your nighttime routine is, keep it brief and sweet. Consistency is the key. Dr. Jodi Mindell, Ph.D., a paediatric sleep researcher, suggests that families choose three to four things to undertake in the same order every night, such as bathing, massage, reading, and listening to lullabies for a good night’s sleep.

When a child is overtired, it is quite difficult for them to go asleep and activate their circadian rhythm. In order for a youngster to go asleep comfortably, their “sleep bucket” must be full.

Start Routine Before They Hit Overtired – Avoid Routine When Under-Tired

Once you have an overtired child, bedtime will not be easy and your child won’t have quality sleep, no matter what kind of routine you have in place. This is why the importance of a toddler bedtime routine is so dire.

Kids that stay up later can hit the overtired stage fairly quickly and can be very tough to calm back down and you may have a tantrum to deal with during the calm-down time.

If your toddler still takes naps during the day, make sure that their naps are not too early in the day so that there is too much time between nap and bedtime. If there is too much of a gap between nap and bedtime, try moving bedtime to an earlier time.

On the other hand, also make sure your child is not under tired. Having an under-tired child will make bedtime a complete nightmare. Your toddler needs to be tired enough to go to sleep so if the nap was late, bedtime will need to be a little bit later as well.

Attention, behaviour, learning, memory, emotion control, quality of life, and mental and physical health are all improved in children who receive enough sleep. Regularly not getting enough sleep, on the other hand, is linked to depression, emotional and mental illnesses, diabetes, obesity, hypertension, and self-injury.

What to Include in Your Bedtime Routine

Bedtime Bath

According to Dr. Jodi Mindell, the more evidence she sees, the more confident she is that baths are an excellent addition to a good bedtime routine Baths are multi-sensory and have an effect on core body temperature, both of which can tell the body to relax.

Bedtime Massage

For one month, children were either read a story or given a 15-minute massage by their parents before bedtime in one research. Children who were massaged fell asleep faster and used fewer nighttime stalling techniques than those who were given stories before their predictable bedtime routine.

Bedtime Stories

It’s possible that reading books together will help your child’s cognitive development rather than improve his or her sleep. However, I would argue that reading a bedtime story is beneficial to more than only cognitive and brain development.

Whether you read or tell a story, the cultural custom of sharing stories before a healthy bedtime routine provides a particular time for parents and children to bond and meet their emotional needs.

What to Try When Your Child Has Anxiety at Bedtime

Your kid may begin to fight the pattern or have difficulty calming down during the transition to a more consistent schedule or at periods in their life when they have a lot going on.

It’s natural for us to ponder about our anxieties at night. This is something we do as parents as well. We begin to realise our anxieties as the day calms down and we lie down to sleep, sometimes in the silence.

The same is true for children. The difference is that kids may not be able to express their tension by saying, “Hey Mom, I’m stressed.” “Don’t leave,” “remain with me,” “I can’t sleep,” they say instead.

Here are some suggestions for when your child is having a particularly difficult time relaxing.

Pump Up Quality Time

Children might become estranged from their parents, especially when they are in school all day and you are at work.

After your bath, take a 10-minute break to regroup. Call it “Our special time,” and encourage your youngster to speak and listen actively. Ask them about the three finest aspects of their day and give them three things you like about them to start the conversation.

Try A Snack

Kids are hungry from time to time, especially when they are going through a growth spurt. Low blood sugar might also make you feel anxious.

If your child begins to want a snack, prepare one ahead of time. We have bedtime snacks as part of our daily routine.

Items That Helped Me With Toddler Bedtime Routine

Chalkboard Magnet: We use a chalkboard “chore” chart to write out the bedtime routine, especially when we were still figuring it out. Once we got it down pat, I printed out a paper copy and laminated it for the fridge and then designated the chore chart for actual chores.

Snuggly Teddy Bear: We got our stuffed animal at a place called Build-A-Bear where they sell many stuffed animals and my children both chose bears when they were 18 months old. I’m so excited to get my third child a bear from there too when the time comes! They also have very nice teddy bears on Amazon.

Fun Toothbrushes: To make brushing teeth more exciting, I like to get the children fun toothbrushes with their favorite characters and exciting lights on them. We get some fun flavored toothpaste as well and then let the kids decide which flavor they want that night. Did I mention that giving choices can help prevent meltdowns? If not, then hear me now…provide choices.

Bedtime Stories: We have books that the children simply like to use for bedtime. One favorite bedtime story around here is Mortimor, Andrews Loose Tooth, and Hush Little Puppy as part of the bedtime routine.

Sleep Clock: A toddler sleep clock can help your child see that it is clearly bedtime and it is time to stay in bed, not wander the house. A sleep clock can help you keep a consistent routine. This sleep clock also acts as a nightlight to help keep the room not so dark and scary for your little one.

White Noise Machine: White noise isn’t just for babies. Toddlers love white noise to help them drift off into a deep sleep. If you don’t have a white noise machine yet, I highly suggest purchasing one for each bedroom to help everyone in your home sleep better.

Awesome Bedding: Ok it’s not a must-have bedtime item for toddlers but it’s always fun to have great bedding which can make you more excited for bedtime. Toddlers tend to love certain cartoons so if they have a favorite get it for the bedding set! My boys love spiderman and Blippi so we go the spiderman sets for their beds.

Bedtime Routine For Toddlers

Do you think you have the tools needed to make a new routine for your toddler? I hope so! I mean, I am not a professional sleep consultant but I did find some science backed research for you to help you as best I can.

I am just a momma who has been there, done that. If these tips don’t work out for you, I would suggest going to see your pediatrician to see if they have any more suggestions for you.

How To Create A Toddler Bedtime Routine

Why Is It Important To Create A Bedtime Routine For Toddlers?

How To Plan Out A Bedtime Routine

example of a bedtime routine