How To Create A Parenting Mantra
Parenting: it’s not just a job; it’s an adventure, a journey, a rollercoaster ride of highs, lows, and a few upside-down loop-de-loops.
As a mom of three, I’ve had my fair share of ‘hold onto your hat’ moments.
So, how do we, as parents, stay grounded amidst the chaos? One word: mantras. Yes, those little phrases that can magically turn our mindset around.
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The Power of a Parenting Mantra
What is a Parenting Mantra?
A parenting mantra is a short, positive phrase or statement that you repeat to yourself during challenging parenting moments. It’s like a lifeline you throw to yourself when you’re drowning in a sea of temper tantrums, teenage angst, or just the overwhelming demands of parenthood.
Why Mantras?
Why mantras, you ask? Well, let me tell you. Mantras are powerful because they focus our mind and offer a quick reset. They’re like mental deep breaths. Plus, they’re simple enough that even in the midst of a cereal-splosion (yes, that’s a thing), you can remember them.
Creating Your Own Parenting Mantra
Step 1: Reflect on Your Parenting Challenges
First, reflect on your parenting challenges. Are you constantly feeling overwhelmed? Do you lose your cool too quickly? Identifying your biggest hurdles is the first step to creating a mantra that truly resonates.
Step 2: Focus on Your Desired Outcome
Next, focus on what you wish to feel or achieve. Want more patience? Need to embrace the chaos? Your mantra should be a beacon towards your desired state.
Step 3: Keep It Positive and Present
Make sure your mantra is positive and in the present tense. Instead of saying, “I won’t yell,” try “I am calm and patient.” See the difference?
Step 4: Make It Personal
Your mantra should be personal to you. It’s your secret weapon, your personal cheerleader. It doesn’t have to make sense to anyone but you.
Step 5: Repeat, Repeat, Repeat
Lastly, repetition is key. The more you use your mantra, the more effective it becomes. Stick it on your fridge, your mirror, or set it as a reminder on your phone.
Examples of Parenting Mantras
- “This too shall pass.” Great for those particularly tough days.
- “I am doing my best, and that’s enough.” Perfect for the perfectionist parent.
- “I choose calm over chaos.” A lifesaver during meltdown mayhem.
- “Every day is a new beginning.” For when yesterday was a disaster.
- “I am a good parent, even on hard days.” A reminder that tough days don’t define you.
Implementing Your Mantra in Daily Life
In Moments of Stress
The real test of a mantra is in those high-stress moments. When you feel like you’re about to lose it, take a deep breath, and repeat your mantra. You’d be surprised how it can shift your mindset.
During Quiet Reflection
Use your mantra during quiet moments too. Reflect on its meaning and let it reinforce your parenting values.
Share with Your Family
Why keep the good stuff to yourself? Share your mantra with your family. It could become a family motto.
Creating a parenting mantra is a simple, yet powerful tool. It’s like having a best friend who whispers just the right words at just the right moment. So, go ahead, give it a try. And remember, in the wild world of parenting, sometimes you just need to laugh, breathe, and repeat your mantra.
References
- Affirmation of Personal Values Buffers Neuroendocrine and Psychological Stress Responses: A study by Creswell et al. (2005) found that affirmations of personal values can attenuate physiological and psychological stress responses. Participants who affirmed their values before a laboratory stress challenge had significantly lower cortisol responses compared to control participants, suggesting that reflecting on personal values can help keep stress responses at low levels (Creswell et al., 2005).
- Meditation programs for psychological stress and well-being: A systematic review and meta-analysis by Goyal et al. (2014) highlighted the moderate evidence of mindfulness meditation programs improving anxiety, depression, and pain, suggesting that meditation, which often incorporates affirmations, can result in small to moderate reductions of multiple negative dimensions of psychological stress (Goyal et al., 2014).
- Self-Affirmation Improves Problem-Solving under Stress: Research by Creswell et al. (2013) demonstrated that self-affirmation could improve problem-solving performance in chronically stressed individuals. This suggests that affirmations can be a strategy for enhancing cognitive function under stress, which is highly relevant for parents facing daily stressors (Creswell et al., 2013).
- The Impact of Self-Affirmation on Health Cognition, Health Behaviour and Other Health-Related Responses: A narrative review by Harris and Epton (2009) summarized the literature on self-affirmation and health, showing that self-affirming activities can increase acceptance of health-risk information, improve stress responses, and potentially lead to healthier behaviors and outcomes (Harris & Epton, 2009).