18 Ways Parents Can Build Their Child’s Resilience

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Everyone knows that intelligence is an important factor in life, but there’s another trait that might be even more important—resilience. Resilience is the ability to bounce back from challenges and setbacks in life. It gives you a thicker skin and helps you handle major disappointments. But how can parents teach their children to be resilient? Here are some tips:

Create a safe environment for your children to open up

Children are not adults, so don’t push too hard or try to get your child to open up. They will eventually, but it may take time. If they’re not ready and you push them too hard, they might shut down completely and become stubborn about talking about their feelings. Instead of trying to convince your child that it’s important for them to open up and talk about their feelings (which can feel like pressure), focus on creating a safe environment in which they feel comfortable doing so when they’re ready. Here are some ideas:

  • Make sure there aren’t any distractions around when you’re having a conversation with your children—turn off the TV and put away mobile devices so they have your full attention! It’s important that parents maintain eye contact during these talks because it helps kids feel heard by letting them know that what they’re saying is being noticed by parents who care about them deeply enough not just sit back passively while their kid is struggling through something difficult;
  • Give kids plenty of time after asking questions before moving onto another topic; this gives kids time to think before responding as well as gives parents more opportunity than usual since most conversations happen quickly without much thought given beforehand–which means we often don’t remember details later on either!

Keep children active, but don’t push too hard

  • Keep children active. It’s important for kids to develop a sense of their own physical limits, but it’s also important not to push them too hard. When your child is ready for new challenges, encourage them by providing opportunities for climbing higher or running faster. This can help build resilience as well as physical strength and stamina.
  • Encourage creativity and imagination: Talk with your kids about things such as art, music and dance—even if they aren’t interested in these activities themselves at first! Sharing these interests will help you bond with your child while giving them something else positive on which they can focus their energy away from anxiety-provoking situations such as homework assignments or social situations where they feel uncomfortable (e.g., parties).

Help your child find their own backing team

The first step toward building your child’s resilience is to help them identify their “backing team,” or the people who support them in their endeavors. This could be a coach, mentor, teacher or family member. To get started, ask your child questions such as:

  • Who is on your backing team?
  • What are the roles of each person on the team?
  • What has one member of your team done for you that helped build your resilience?
  • How can you recruit new members to your backing team?

The most important part of this exercise is that it allows children to take ownership over their own development and gives them tools they can use throughout life as they face challenges head-on. Helping a child find his or her own backing team will give him/her confidence in approaching new situations with strength and determination — two key components of resilience!

Give kids the tools to overcome challenges

If you want your child to be resilient, give them the tools to overcome challenges.

  • Help them learn how to deal with failure by praising their effort and not their outcome.
  • Teach them how to deal with disappointment by focusing on what they can control and not allowing themselves to be overwhelmed by negative emotions.
  • Encourage healthy stress management practices, such as exercising regularly or meditating (or both!) to help your kids cope with stress better.
  • Encourage children to create a contingency plan when faced with change in their lives so they know what steps they need take in order find success despite any adversity they may encounter along the way.
  • Be sure that kids know how important it is for them express themselves during times of conflict – don’t worry about saying something wrong or upsetting others around you; just have fun talking through your problems!

Make sure that kids know about their family’s history and its traditions

As a parent, you should be aware of the importance of family history and tradition. You want your children to be aware of their past and the people who came before them. However, it’s important to remember that children don’t necessarily need to know every detail about their ancestors. They just need enough information so that they can appreciate why certain things are important in your family, such as:

  • Family stories (fictional or nonfiction)
  • Family values
  • Family recipes

Teach Them To Make Social Connections

  • Make friends
  • Learn to be a good friend
  • Learn to be a good listener
  • Learn to be a good communicator (this is especially important as you can communicate with your child in many different ways, including via technology)
  • Learn how to make friends in different situations (such as meeting new people at school or in the neighborhood, joining clubs or teams)

Allow Your Child To Learn To Help Others

When it comes to building your child’s resilience, there is no better way than to teach them how to help others.

It will not only build their character and make your child a better person but also give them the opportunity to learn from their mistakes without making them feel like they did something wrong. This will show that the world is not just about you and that you need other people in order for anything worthwhile to happen.

It teaches children how important it is for us all work together as one community rather than individuals trying to make themselves look good at the expense of others feelings, even if this means taking less credit for themselves or sharing resources more evenly with others around them.

Keep A Daily Routine

One of the most important things you can do is make sure your child has a daily routine. Routine helps to make life predictable, reduce stress and anxiety, and build confidence in children.

If you have a set schedule for bedtime and wake time, for example, it will help with their sleep which will in turn help them feel more rested and ready to take on new challenges. This can also be as simple as having a certain time each day where they have free play time or an opportunity to practice skills such as reading or counting by twos (or whatever skill they are working on).

Encourage Your Kids To take Breaks

It’s important for kids to learn to relax and take regular breaks. Taking a break from technology, school work, or chores is important so they can reflect on their day and recharge. This will help them be more productive in the long run.

If your child is having trouble winding down after school, encourage them to do something physical or creative before bedtime. For example:

  • Take a walk outside (or inside if it’s cold)
  • Play with an action figure or toy car
  • Draw a picture using crayons or colored pencils

Teach Kids Self Care

  • Talk to your kids about their feelings. When you’re talking with your child, be open and honest about how you feel—especially if your child gets upset. Don’t tell them “It’s okay” or “Don’t cry,” but instead say something like “I understand why that makes you sad.”
  • Talk to your kids about taking care of their bodies. As children grow older, it’s important for parents to make sure they’re getting plenty of exercise and eating nutritious food (and not just sugar!). Showing them how much energy the body needs helps build resilience in the long run.
  • Talk to your kids about taking care of their minds by providing opportunities for learning new things and challenging what they already know or have learned through playtime activities outside of school time—like board games at home with family members or reading a book together as part of bedtime routine before lights out at night!
  • Teach children how they can take care of themselves spiritually by introducing them early on in life – preferably when they’re infants – into some form(s)of spirituality such as Christianity (or Catholicism specifically), Judaism etc.; but there’s no reason why atheists cannot adopt this practice either!”

Set Goals and Accomplish Them (Kids Are Watching you)

  • Set goals for yourself and your family. Setting goals is important not only for you, but also for your children. If they see you setting goals, it will encourage them to do the same thing.
  • Set realistic goals and try to accomplish them in a timely manner. This can help build up their self-esteem and give them a sense of accomplishment as well as teach them how to achieve their own goals with hard work and dedication.
  • Be open to new ideas and don’t be afraid of making changes if something isn’t working out well. These are things that parents should always remember when dealing with their children’s behavior – especially if they seem stressed out or anxious all the time!

Have A Positive View Of Yourself

When you feel good about yourself, you can deal with the world. That’s why it’s so important to build your child’s self-esteem.

There are many ways you can do this: praising them when they do well at something, encouraging them to try new things and believing in their abilities to accomplish whatever task they set out to do. Encouraging them not just by saying “good job” but also by asking questions about their day at school or work will show that what they have to say is important as well.

Another way you support your child’s self-esteem is by spending time with them without distractions (like TV or computer games). Have conversations about things that interest both of you—even if those topics are just where each other lives or who has a pet cat named Garfield! It’s also helpful for parents to set aside special times each week where they spend quality time with each kid individually; this allows children an opportunity to get attention from mommy/daddy without having another sibling around who might not want the same thing from Mommy/Daddy as well

Teach Problem Solving Skills

Problem solving skills are essential for resilience. Research shows that children who have better problem solving abilities tend to be more resilient than their peers. Problem solving involves thinking about different ways to solve a problem, what the best solution could be, and how they could have solved it differently.

Teach your child how to identify problems in everyday situations so they can begin developing their own methods of dealing with them. If a toy breaks, teach them how to search online or ask an adult for help finding new parts they can use instead of throwing away the broken one immediately (or vice versa if the broken toy is still usable).

Label Emotions

The first step to building resilience is teaching your child how to identify emotions. When a child is upset, they should be able to label what they are feeling. Once they’ve identified the emotion, you can help them learn how to express themselves and control their feelings. This can be done through games, songs, or other activities that make your child feel happier after the activity is over.

Demonstrate Coping Skills

So, how can parents build their child’s resilience?

  • Demonstrate coping skills.
  • Be clear about what you are trying to achieve. For example: “I have a headache and am going to take some painkillers.” Or “I feel tired and need some extra rest.”
  • Be honest about your own limitations. For example: “I’m sorry I snapped at you, but I really need some quiet time right now.”
  • Open yourself up to ideas from others. It’s OK if someone else has the answer to a problem that’s been troubling you for days! Their experience may provide insight into how to deal with it in a way that works best for you or them (or both).

Play Games To Learn Frustration Tolerance

Try to find a game where the rules are consistent, but one player can win and the other can lose. For example, use a deck of regular playing cards (or even two decks) to play War. Each round, one player draws a card from their own deck and another draws one from their opponent’s deck (both players shuffle before each round).

The first person who gets four cards in a row wins that round — so if you draw four Aces or Kings in a row, you’ve won! If you draw an Ace followed by three Kings in your first three turns, though, you’re out of luck: You’ve lost because there isn’t any way to win at this point.

  • Play with your child until both of you get tired or frustrated; then stop playing for today.
  • Talk about what happened when either one of you won or lost: Did someone feel good about winning? Did someone feel bad about losing? Why? Think about how people usually react when they win — do they celebrate loudly or quietly? Are they happy for themselves or excited for everyone else too? How would it be different if someone won something they didn’t want very much at all (like when my son got lucky enough with his rolls during Monopoly)? Do these things change if we start talking about how many points somebody got instead of just whether they won overall?”

Embrace Mistakes

One of the best ways to build your child’s resilience is to embrace mistakes. Mistakes are a normal part of growing up, and they can be used as opportunities for growth and learning.

When your child makes a mistake, don’t immediately jump in with criticism or negativity—instead, try asking them how they might solve whatever problem has arisen. This will show that you trust them to figure things out on their own, which in turn will give them confidence when tackling future situations.

Play Outside

Another way to help your child develop resilience is by encouraging them to engage in play outside. It’s good for the physical health of children, because it gets them moving and helps them develop a stronger immune system.

It also helps with mental health, because it helps kids learn problem solving, creativity and social skills. And while playing outside will never completely eliminate stress from a child’s life (what fun would that be?), it can give children an outlet for stress relief and a place where they can be creative or work on social skills in a low-pressure environment.

Playtime doesn’t have to look like organized sports or structured activities either—it can be as simple as going out onto your front yard with a friend or sibling and throwing around a football!

And this kind of free-form play allows kids an opportunity to figure out how best fit into their social groups which will help them later when learning how make friends at school or making new friends at camp when you’re older

Resilience may be more important than intelligence when it comes to being happy

Resilience is the ability to recover quickly from difficult situations, learn from past mistakes and move forward. It’s the quality that helps people bounce back when they face challenges such as divorce or illness.


As parents, we want to give our children every advantage that we can. We want to make sure they’re smart and successful, but it’s important to remember that resilience is just as important.

If they can learn how to handle challenges, they will be more prepared for whatever life throws at them. One way we can help build resilience in children is by encouraging them to explore their passions and interests—and by showing them how fun it is to do so!

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