The Secret To Being A Calm Mom - Tired Mom Supermom

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How you can handle challenging situations when emotions run high and you feel like lashing out at your children. Stay calm, check your own emotions and then you can attend to your child in a calm and effective way.

Children can really trigger our emotions sometimes, and anger is one that pops up easily when we are stressed out, low on sleep, and feel touched out on a daily basis. Learning how to control your own emotions before attending to the problems at hand with your children will change the way you parent in the best way. I know you can do it! You can’t control everything that happens, but you can control how you react and respond.

Personally, I still struggle with it some days. Most of the time I can put these practices into place and take a deep breath before dealing with whatever situation just made me feel angry, but there are days where I lose it and yell.

REMEMBER THAT BEING A CALM PARENT WILL TAKE PRACTICE, AND IT’S ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE TO MASTER CALM PARENTING IN ONE DAY. GIVE YOURSELF GRACE, LOVE AND TIME.

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6 Calm Down Strategies For Moms

Stop What You’re Doing and Focus

When you find yourself losing control, the greatest thing you can do is halt everything. Take a few deep breaths after that. This allows you to put some time between the stressor and your response, ensuring that you aren’t reacting based on your emotions. It also calms your nerves and relieves stress and anxiety by slowing your heart rate, allowing more air into your body, lowering your blood pressure, and reducing muscular tension.

Take A Break

Don’t give your kid a time out, give yourself a time out. Don’t be afraid to tell your kids you’re not feeling happy and need a minute to cool down when things get hot. Remove yourself from the situation until you are able to reply calmly and rationally. This will not only assist you in de-stressing, but it will also serve as an example of a good de-stressing method for your children!

Remind Yourself Of Your Parenting Goals

When we feel compelled to respond angrily, we might ask ourselves, “Does what I want to do right now accord with my ideals as a mother?” Will this help me achieve my mothering goals?” We may keep ourselves responsible to our overarching goal by taking a moment to consider how we want to mother our children. When we do, we’ll be more concerned with correcting and educating our children than with expressing our own frustrations.

Think 3 Minutes Ahead

It’s all too simple to react in a way that makes you feel wonderful right now, but consider how you’ll feel later. Concentrate on the larger picture of your mothering and your children’s connections. Consider the consequences of erupting in rage on their hearts. Don’t say anything permanently harmful simply because you’re temporarily furious off.

Flip Your Mindset

I’ve discovered that merely changing my thinking may shift the direction of my emotional spirals. When I find myself thinking “I can’t stand this!” or “They’re driving me insane!” I purposefully change my script to affirmations like “God provides me with the insight and strength I require” and “My children are a blessing and a delight.” It may appear to be too easy to be true, yet it alters my attitude and viewpoint, and hence my response.

Ask Yourself What The Trigger Was

Try to gain some clarity regarding your reaction once you’ve taken a minute to relax. Consider why the issue has affected you so much. Are you taking your children’s actions too seriously? Do you have unrealistic expectations for their age and maturity? Are you truly stressed about anything else and behaving as a result of it?

Staying Ahead Of Your Emotions Is Key

Calming down techniques for moms are beneficial and required. But it’s also a good idea to avoid those mommy moments before they happen. Here are three techniques to take control of your emotions:

1. Find Your Triggers

Pay attention to any trends you discover using your responses from #7 above. Is there a certain time of day (or month) when you have the most trouble? Do you have a tendency to become agitated in specific settings or scenarios? Are you finding that the same external pressures are prompting you to lose your cool?

You may build a strategy to handle your triggers once you’ve recognized some of them. To make your days go more smoothly, you might require a better morning or evening routine. Perhaps you’ll need to put in place some domestic measures to alleviate some of your stress. Perhaps you require healing for deep-seated concerns and difficulties. Investing time now to manage your triggers will pay off in the long term with peace of mind.

2. Have A Parenting Plan

Because I have trouble thinking on my feet, dealing to behaviour problems and other stressful parenting circumstances in the moment is challenging for me. So, while I’m calm and level-headed, I’ve learned to think through potential behavioural difficulties and devise a strategy for dealing with them. This helps me respond calmly when problems arise by preventing reactions based entirely on emotions or sentiments in the heat of the moment.

3. Practice your Parenting Plan

The more you use the aforementioned relaxation techniques, the more natural they will seem. First, try practising them in a low-stress environment. Stopping to assess your reactions is a good habit to get into. Deep breathing should be practised. Practice consciously picking your ideas. Exercising long-term thinking is a good idea. Also, get in the habit of tracking your feelings back to their source. When the stakes are low, practising will help you be ready when the stakes are high.

Calm Down Strategies For Moms Bottom Line

In moments of distress, your energy becomes their energy. Provide the environment that you wish to be in, instead of a reactive, explosive situation that could end up hurting feelings and big emotions.

You are not alone if you react to situations in an angry way. I struggle with this myself, but the most important thing is that we try. All of us, collectively, need to try to be calm around our little human beings who want so much to be like us. We are their world, and scaring them with anger can be damaging to their soul.

It is ok to feel all the emotions that we feel as parents. Frustration, sadness, anger all creep up throughout the long days of parenting and feelings of disrespect and rejection are common.

I know these feelings are great, but they are understandable and you are allowed to have them. This is a difficult journey and all of these feelings will pass eventually.

How you handle these feelings is up to you. You can get grounded and you do your best to stay calm using some of the tips I mentioned.

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“GENTLE PARENTING IS A LIFESTYLE THAT EMBRACES BOTH YOUR PHYSICAL AND PSYCHOLOGICAL BEHAVIOR, NOT ONLY TOWARDS YOUR CHILDREN, BUT TO YOURSELF TOO“
— SARA HOCKWELL-SMITH