50 Things Parents Can Do To Help Older Siblings Accept A New Baby

As a mom of three, I’ve been through the rollercoaster of introducing a new baby to older siblings.

It’s a mix of excitement, jealousy, curiosity, and a tiny bit of chaos (okay, maybe a lot). So, let’s dive into the things you can do to help older siblings accept a new baby in the family.

Buckle up; it’s going to be a fun, bumpy ride!

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1. Prepare them in advance

Before the baby arrives, talk to your older child about the upcoming addition to the family. This helps them mentally prepare for the change and reduces the element of surprise.

2. Read books about new siblings together

Choose age-appropriate books that discuss the arrival of a new baby. Reading these books together can open up discussions and help your child understand what to expect.

3. Visit friends or relatives with newborns

Spending time around other babies can familiarize your older child with the sights and sounds of infants, making the arrival of their own sibling less intimidating.

4. Discuss their role as a big brother or sister

Talk to your older child about their important role as a big brother or sister. Emphasize how they can help and teach them about their responsibilities.

5. Include them in baby-related decisions

Involve your older child in decisions related to the baby, such as choosing a name or picking out nursery decor. This gives them a sense of ownership and importance.

6. Keep routines as consistent as possible

Maintain your older child’s daily routines as much as possible to provide stability and reassurance during the period of adjustment.

7. Plan special one-on-one time with the older sibling

Allocate regular one-on-one time with your older child to reassure them that they are still loved and valued.

8. Praise them for being a great older sibling

Acknowledge and praise your older child for their efforts in taking care of the new baby. Positive reinforcement can boost their self-esteem.

9. Share baby photos from when they were born

Show your older child their baby photos and share stories about their own infancy to help them relate to the new baby.

10. Explain that babies require a lot of care and attention

Help your older child understand that babies need constant care and attention, which may temporarily limit the time you spend with them.

11. Let them feel the baby’s movements during pregnancy

Allow your older child to gently touch your belly to feel the baby’s movements, involving them in the pregnancy experience.

12. Let them help with baby preparations

Include your older child in preparing for the baby’s arrival, such as folding baby clothes or organizing baby supplies.

13. Buy them a gift “from the baby”

Consider giving your older child a small gift from the new baby as a gesture of sibling bonding.

14. Let them choose a small gift for the baby

Allow your older child to pick out a gift for the new baby. This fosters a sense of connection and ownership.

15. Show them ultrasound images of the baby

Share ultrasound images with your older child, explaining that these pictures show their future sibling growing inside mommy’s tummy.

16. Watch videos of siblings bonding

Watch videos or movies with your older child that depict positive sibling relationships to illustrate the joys of having a sibling.

17. Teach them about gentle touch and handling

Show your older child how to gently touch and handle the baby, emphasizing the importance of being gentle and careful.

18. Show them how to hold the baby with supervision

Once the baby arrives, teach your older child how to hold their new sibling under your supervision, promoting bonding and responsibility.

19. Encourage them to talk or sing to the baby in the womb

Encourage your older child to talk or sing to the baby in your belly, helping them feel connected even before birth.

20. Allow them to be present at the birth if they’re interested

If your older child expresses interest in being present at the birth, consider involving them in a way that is appropriate for their age and comfort level.

21. Explain how babies communicate

Discuss with your older child how babies communicate through crying, sleeping, and other cues, so they can better understand the baby’s needs.

22. Arrange for them to meet the baby as soon as possible

Try to introduce your older child to the baby as soon as possible after birth to begin the bonding process.

23. Let them help with baby’s first bath

Under your close supervision, involve your older child in giving the baby their first bath to create a sense of shared responsibility.

24. Share stories about their own babyhood

Talk to your older child about their own babyhood, sharing memories and experiences from when they were little.

25. Express love and affection toward the older sibling

Continue to show love and affection to your older child to reassure them of their place in your heart.

26. Remind them that they are still special and loved

Frequently remind your older child that they are unique and loved, despite the new addition to the family.

27. Involve them in diaper-changing and feeding

When age-appropriate, involve your older child in tasks like diaper-changing and feeding under your guidance.

28. Allow them to choose baby’s outfits

Let your older child pick out the baby’s outfits sometimes, making them feel like a part of caring for the new arrival.

29. Create a special “big sibling” space in the nursery

Designate an area in the nursery where your older child can have their special belongings or a place to spend time with the baby.

30. Encourage drawing or crafting for the baby

Encourage your older child to create artwork or crafts as gifts for the baby, fostering a sense of involvement and creativity.

31. Share responsibilities in baby care

Divide caregiving responsibilities between parents and involve your older child in age-appropriate tasks.

32. Organize playdates for the older sibling

Arrange playdates with friends or family members of a similar age to give your older child opportunities to socialize and have fun.

33. Arrange for outings with just the older sibling

Occasionally plan outings or activities that are exclusively for your older child to strengthen your bond.

34. Have a family meeting to discuss any concerns

Hold family meetings where everyone can share their feelings and concerns about the new addition, creating an open and supportive environment.

35. Read books together about sibling relationships

Explore books that focus on positive sibling relationships to encourage discussion and understanding.

36. Celebrate milestones and achievements together

Acknowledge and celebrate your older child’s achievements and milestones to show that their accomplishments still matter.

37. Let them choose a bedtime story for the baby

Involve your older child in bedtime routines by allowing them to choose a story to read to the baby.

38. Encourage them to talk about their feelings

Create a safe space for your older child to express their emotions and talk about their feelings regarding the new baby.

39. Be patient and understanding during challenging times

Recognize that adjusting to a new sibling can be challenging for your older child, and be patient and understanding during difficult moments.

40. Create a baby scrapbook or photo album together

Start a scrapbook or photo album that includes memories of both the older child and the new baby, highlighting their journey together.

41. Teach them to gently sing lullabies to the baby

Encourage your older child to sing gentle lullabies to the baby, promoting a nurturing bond between them.

Our favorite lullabies were

• twinkle twinkle little star
• Baa Baa Black Sheep
• Row Your Boat

42. Arrange playtime with other families who have newborns

Set up playdates with families who also have newborns, allowing your older child to interact with other siblings in similar situations.

43. Offer rewards for helpful behavior

Provide positive reinforcement by offering rewards or incentives for helpful and caring behavior toward the new baby.

44. Allow them to be the “helper” when needed

Empower your older child by letting them assist with tasks related to the baby, making them feel important and capable.

45. Give them opportunities for alone time with each parent

Ensure your older child still has quality one-on-one time with each parent to maintain their sense of connection and importance.

You can connect through questions like these!

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46. Organize family outings to special places

Plan family outings to places your older child loves, creating memorable experiences together.

47. Reassure them that their needs will be met too

Let your older child know that their needs and desires are still important and will be met even with the new baby in the family.

48. Share stories about your own sibling experiences

Share stories from your own childhood about your experiences with siblings, which can help your child relate.

49. Play games that involve the whole family

Engage in family games and activities that promote bonding and togetherness.

50. Celebrate each sibling’s unique qualities and talents

Encourage and celebrate the unique qualities and talents of each child, reinforcing their individuality and value within the family.

Want More On Parenting?

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Sources

• Preparation and Anticipation: A study by Rawstrone (2022) emphasizes the importance of preparing older children for the arrival of a new sibling to help them embrace the change positively (Rawstrone, 2022).
• Reading and Educational Materials: The American Academy of Pediatrics’ “Bright Futures Parent Handout: 18 Month Visit” suggests reading books about being a big brother or sister to help prepare for a new baby (Pediatric Patient Education, 2021).
• Role of Older Siblings: Bontinck et al. (2018) found that interactions between older siblings and a new baby, especially in families where a child has autism, can be complex, highlighting the need for understanding and support in these dynamics (Bontinck et al., 2018).
• Involvement in Baby-Related Activities: A paper by Grillère and Bernard-Berger (2021) discusses the role of family in the development of a baby, suggesting that involving older siblings in baby care can be beneficial (Grillère & Bernard-Berger, 2021).
• Maintaining Routines: The paper by Aydon et al. (2018) emphasizes the importance of maintaining family routines during transitions, such as the introduction of a new baby (Aydon et al., 2018).
• Encouraging Positive Sibling Interactions: Havron et al. (2019) discuss the impact of older siblings on the language development of younger siblings, which can be relevant in understanding sibling dynamics and encouraging positive interactions (Havron et al., 2019).
• Promoting Understanding and Empathy: Tzuriel and Hanuka-Levy (2019) explore how older siblings can play a role in the cognitive and social development of their younger siblings, suggesting strategies for promoting understanding and empathy (Tzuriel & Hanuka-Levy, 2019).
• Special Attention and Reassurance: Lonsdorf et al. (2018) study sibling interactions in chimpanzees, offering insights into the natural dynamics of sibling relationships which can be extrapolated to human siblings (Lonsdorf et al., 2018).
• Navigating Sibling Rivalry and Conflict: Ravitz (2022) discusses the psychological impact of a new sibling on the firstborn, highlighting strategies to navigate the challenges of sibling rivalry and conflict (Ravitz, 2022).
• Sibling Support Interventions: A study by Barrera et al. (2018) explores the outcomes of sibling group interventions, emphasizing the benefits of targeted support for siblings of children with cancer, which can be adapted for siblings in general (Barrera et al., 2018).